Inspired with Nika Lawrie

Keeping Your New Years Resolution Going All Year Long with Cheryl Wolf

• Nika Lawrie, Cheryl Wolf • Season 2022 • Episode 30

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Today Cheryl Wolf shares tips for staying on track with your New Years Resolution all year long. 

ABOUT THE GUEST:
It took a terminal diagnosis for Cheryl Wolf to start living well. While she waited for possible treatment, she was inspired to go back to school while running a full-time business. Four years later she received her treatment, had let go of 45 lbs, and was taking care of her health so she had no side effects from the treatment. Cheryl took her transformation and turned it into a business helping other women on their wellness journey.

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CONNECT WITH NIKA: https://mtr.bio/nika-lawrie

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*This podcast and its contents are for informational purposes only and are not intended to replace professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult your physician or a qualified health provider for any questions concerning a medical condition or health objectives. Additionally, the advice and strategies contained herein may not be suitable for every individual and are not guaranteed for business, personal, or wellness success. Use discretion and seek professional counsel when necessary.

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Nika Lawrie:

Hey, Cheryl, welcome to the show. I'm so happy to have you here today.

Cheryl Wolf:

Thank you, I'm excited to be here with you.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, so we have a lot in common and I love it. But I want you to tell the listener a little bit about yourself, give us a little bit of backstory what you do, who you are, what led you to where you are today?

Cheryl Wolf:

Well, I'm a health coach, a holistic health coach, and how that came about is approximately seven years ago. I was diagnosed with a terminal illness and kind of sent me on a discovery journey. And I went to the doctor and I was like, okay, I might get treatment, I might not get a treatment, so what do I do? You know, how do I deal with this? How do I take care of my health? And I was holding on to quite a bit of extra weight as well, and so my only advice was well, take care and eat. Well, I thought, okay, what does that mean?

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah right.

Cheryl Wolf:

So it started that whole process of okay, it inspired me, so I went back to school to become a health coach while I was running my hair business, which is kind of counseling without pay. And then, because I had learned all these things and dropped off some weight, when I did get the treatment, four years later, I had no side effects and now I get to help other women that want to improve their health and drop off a little weight.

Nika Lawrie:

That's phenomenal. Well, I'm so glad to hear that you're doing well and that you're feeling good, and it's just such an inspirational story. You hear it so often. Like so many of us in this kind of health and wellness alternative medicine world, started with our own ailments, our own struggles, and when we learn, we learn how much is like missing in the general understanding, like society's general understanding of health and wellness, and so many of us are then driven to help others really heal their bodies because it's so needed anymore. So I commend you for the work you're doing and for the changes you made.

Cheryl Wolf:

Thank you. Yeah, yeah, it's a, it is, it is. We're so much better to help someone when we first help ourselves.

Nika Lawrie:

Right, yeah, yeah, and then, and to understand that it's always kind of this ongoing journey, it's like, yeah, it's not a straight line, absolutely, absolutely, and I think so many people get caught up with that. That really is a kind of a good intro into what we were really going to talk today about, with kind of talking about New Year's Eve resolutions and them kind of fizzling out the first couple of weeks of the year and why people struggle. So why do you think so many people fail with that or struggle to really carry it on throughout the year?

Cheryl Wolf:

I think it's how we set ourselves up. I mean, I know I'm guilty of it. It's like oh, it's the new year, I'm going to read 50 books, I'm going to drop all this weight, I'm going to exercise every day, and I think the goals that we set for ourselves are so large and so big. And then nowadays I would say, it's 90 days to set a new habit in place, because we have so many things that are grabbing our attention that we don't always you know it takes us longer to get that focus.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely. Yeah, I think you know one of my favorite tips when people ask me about New Year's resolutions is to really look at what is the triumph they want to have at the end of the year. So, really looking at, you know, this isn't the short-term kind of thing, it's how do we plan it out, how do we schedule it out to make this really a lifestyle change, opposed to just a diet or a 30-day challenge or something like that. It's like really changing your mindset around it.

Cheryl Wolf:

I really, I totally agree. I think it's a second chance to focus all your energy on not fighting the old.

Nika Lawrie:

Yes.

Cheryl Wolf:

But building the new.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely. Can you share a little bit about you know one of the things that you know? I think we both learned especially from we went to the same health coaching school. But one of the things that they really drive home is kind of bio-individuality and really setting yourself up to understand that you know what's good for you is not necessarily good for someone else, and really focusing on making personalized goals. How do you go about doing that, or what suggestions do you maybe have to think about?

Cheryl Wolf:

Yeah, I really do think that it has to be customized to you, because it really is like what's yeah, what's good for you could be poisoned to someone else. And so I think it is being really, you know, having those curious eyes and being really open to saying, ok, let's try this and see how my body does, and truly pay attention to how your body feels when you take that on and not just say, oh, sally did this and it really worked for her, because it may not work for you, and just be open to you know, testing a few things out and seeing how it works.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely. What are some of the things that you kind of help your clients with when looking at coming up with those kind of goals, those personalized health goals, or maybe overcoming those challenges that they're facing?

Cheryl Wolf:

I think the first thing, because we don't tend to like to pay attention to how we feel, how our body feels, what our thoughts are and so kind of. I start with becoming aware, like become aware of what your self-talk is, become aware of what you say to yourself and be aware of how your body feels. If you're feeling tense, where do you feel it at? Is it in your shoulders? Because when we can start to understand ourselves better, then it makes setting that goal so much easier because you can go. Oh, I'm feeling this now. What are my tools that I can do to help me to?

Cheryl Wolf:

get past that.

Nika Lawrie:

I think that's such a struggle so many of us don't actually like listen to our bodies. We just keep moving through the day so quickly and onto the next task or you know shiny thing that grabs our attention and we're not listening to really what our body's telling us. And I think if we slowed down enough to do that, we'd actually see a lot of the signs that something worse is coming, like a chronic disease or something else is coming. We might actually be able to maybe prevent that by listening to our bodies earlier on.

Cheryl Wolf:

I think that's so true. And it's hard because we are pulled. I mean you can't go on a bus, get in a taxi, go to a business that you're not being stimulated or pulled in another direction. Your phone is binging, everything is pulling you. So it's even so much more important to have that time that you're quiet and you're with just yourself, to kind of see how are you doing.

Nika Lawrie:

Man stimulus, overload, it's so. I mean I love that you brought that up, because that was something I was really struggling with last week. I even just had to stop what I was doing. I took about half an hour to just kind of meditate and disconnect for a little bit, because I just felt so overwhelmed by all the stuff that was going on. I think with the holidays and you know, the news is continuous and there's always something anymore and it was just all these things and it was like decision overload. I couldn't figure out what I wanted to do. You know, I was working on a project and I couldn't figure out what the next step or right direction really was to go. And taking those breaks, that breather time, was total game changer. I came back refreshed and renewed.

Cheryl Wolf:

Yeah, I think that you hit it right. There is that we know now, with all this last few years, that the decision fatigue is real. It is not so. We're used to making decisions, but we've had to make way more decisions than ever before, so people are just like I don't even want to make a choice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, let's make it for me, because we're tired.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, like you know, I all I wanted to do was just go lay in my bed and shut out the world, because I was like I don't, I can't think anymore. I was like, ah, I don't know what to do, and you know. And then when you add on top of that people who are eating really unhealthy and they don't have the nutrients that they need for their body, and then their hormones get out of whack and it makes everything even more difficult to manage and process.

Cheryl Wolf:

Oh, you're right, and I think it's such a slow process to not feeling well. We don't always notice that that thing that you're putting in your body is not helping your brain to be able to function at its best. It's not just about your brain to be able to function at its best, it's not just about you know, it's every organ. It's like getting enough water can make all the difference in the world of how your energy is or how you're dealing with things.

Nika Lawrie:

One of my favorite favorite things about functional medicine is understanding that everything is a single. It's there's different systems, but it's really all one system and it's all intertwined and everything affects something else. And you know, if you don't have the nutrients that you need to, you know, really keep your body at optimal health, different organs are going to struggle and then, when those organs struggle, the other ones are going to struggle and it just causes this ripple effect that ends up turning into a disaster. You know same thing with. You know if your microbiome is out of whack, then your immune system is out of whack, and then you get sick over and over again and it just this, you know again, a ripple effect of just chaos inside your body. And so understanding how everything plays a role and really getting an idea of, like what's going on in there, so that you can start to heal your body, True, that is so true.

Cheryl Wolf:

I think that we are. We are in need of quiet salt rooms and the tanks, the I call them deprivation tanks, but that's not. You know where, you go in and you're quiet. And just having that time to reconnect with ourselves and our emotions so that we can say, yeah, I can feed myself. And when I feed myself this way, I feel so much better, I think better, Everything is functioning better.

Nika Lawrie:

So we digressed a little bit, which I still think is totally okay. My everything is functioning better. So we we digress a little bit, which I still think is totally okay, and it's really important information. But I wanted to ask so what advice do you give yourself or your clients when it comes to setting a new year's resolution? And then the second question which you can answer afterwards is is what advice do you have just to keep it? Like, how do we? You know, we're a couple of weeks into January when this is posting and and I think a lot of people start to struggle with keeping those resolutions, like we we talked about a little bit in the beginning of the episode how do we keep those?

Cheryl Wolf:

How do we keep going? I think the first thing is is don't make it so large and don't and I think we One of the things that we tend to do and I'm guilty of it too is society or family is making these goals. And so you're like OK, I'll do that too. You're a unique individual. Make those goals that you want for yourself, and maybe it is just to feel good in your clothes, but get clear on why and what it is that you want to accomplish. And then it is, you know, making it smaller. And I have to do that in everything, because I'll look at the giant goal and go, oh gosh, that's a lot. I don't know if I can do it.

Cheryl Wolf:

So it is breaking it down into even weekly. It's like okay, today I'm going to write down three things I'm going to do for myself, for my health, and then putting it on your calendar is huge, like scheduling. I schedule my workouts, I schedule what I you know if I'm meal prepping for the week. So it's all on my calendar just like any other appointment, and that will help a lot. And just make it small and make it simple, because if you make it complicated, you'll never stick with it.

Cheryl Wolf:

And so it's like, if you're saying, oh okay, I'm going to work out three times a week, put your shoes out the night before, pack your bag, make things simple for yourself and then if you keep showing up, say for a class, you'll start making friends and then they'll be your accountability as well. And so I also think, know yourself. Are you somebody who likes to achieve goals? Then use a chart. If you're somebody that you know you need accountability, then grab a friend or hire a coach, but set yourself up for success by you know making it simple. I would say.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, yeah. So there's kind of four big things that I always think about when making any type of goal, and and and it really builds off of what you're saying the first is to really get clear on what it is, and so you know, we have so many options and choices anymore, so it's like that decision fatigue is like overwhelming.

Nika Lawrie:

And so I think if we, you know, narrow it down to, you know one or two options that sound really good, so we pick one of those options, so getting really clear on what that goal is like it's going to be.

Nika Lawrie:

You know, maybe somebody wants to quit smoking Hopefully there's not that many smokers anymore but for those who are still smoking, you know if they're smoking, you know three or four cigarettes a day or more than that, cutting it down.

Nika Lawrie:

Maybe you know if, if they're doing four a day, they cut down to three a day for the first two months and then the next two months they cut down to two a day and then one a day, and then you know, spread that out over the next two months, they cut down to two a day and then one a day, and then you know, spread that out over the next six months until you hit the point that you can then move to the nicotine patch and then move from the nicotine patch off of that and kind of build it out and really do that kind of layout.

Nika Lawrie:

But I loved the biggest thing that that really resonated with me is is you said the why behind it, and you know that it's been such a kind of a thing that people have been talking about a lot is is what's your why? And it's it's kind of you know, in the self-help world it's kind of this big thing, but when you really deep, deep down, dive into it, it really does matter. It's that motivational factor, it's it's figuring out what is the reason that's going to drive you to make that change, and I think that's so important.

Cheryl Wolf:

Well, yeah, because even for myself, you know, part of it was my diagnosis, but part of it was the fact that I couldn't walk up a flight of stairs without breathing heavy, and so I wanted to feel better. I wanted to make changes so that I felt better, but what I found was traditional diets don't work. So I'm not a diet fan. Let's customize it for you. What's the food you should be eating, what should you be feeding your mind, what should you be feeding your body and what moves can you make? And motivation will get us started, but the habits keep us going along that path.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely yeah. So that was the number four of my kind of thing there is is. You mentioned putting it into your calendar, and I think people always talk about work-life balance and what. What I see over and over again is people have work scheduled out on their calendar precisely Every hour there's something they're doing, they have all these different meetings, all this stuff, and then, when it comes to their personal life, they don't even have a calendar. Or if they do, it's like they might schedule somebody's birthday party six months from now so they don't forget, but nothing else is scheduled in there. And I'm like, if you're going to be the boss or CEO of your career, why aren't you being the boss or CEO of your home life too? Why aren't you taking control and getting organized and scheduling out those important things that are a priority to you in your personal life too? And that's where you start to find the work-life balance.

Nika Lawrie:

Like that is where you really start to figure out how to manage your time and and take care of those things that are important to you.

Cheryl Wolf:

It's true, and I think it's funny, as I started writing down what are all things that I need to do and not, you know, not laundry or cleaning or any of those things, but just the daily things. And then I went through and thought, ok, so what of these things can I automate to make my life simpler? Because really the goal is to make life less complicated and more simple. And so it's like you're going to, if you're going to binge, watch, you know, netflix for two hours, you definitely can take some time and put those things in your schedule each week. It's like, okay, I'm going to, you know, whatever it is when you block it out and make colors, make it fun, put stickers, whatever it is that you know gets you going, but pick one thing to start with, don't pick five.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, yeah, but pick one thing to start with, don't pick five. How people think that change just happens instantly. They just decide to make that change. The person I was speaking to had quit drinking and they were talking about how the story of how they quit drinking. They were at a wedding and decided to that was it. They didn't wanna get drunk that night. They decided that was it and they quit drinking. But the reality was is that they decided to quit drinking that day, but in order to continue to quit drinking, they've had to make that decision every single day. And the person I was talking to is like 800 days in being sober and it's a big accomplishment in his life, but he has to make that decision every single day. And so keeping that mindset of this is not New Year's Eve, the clock ticks midnight and you're a different person, like it's not that simple.

Nika Lawrie:

And giving yourself that space, that understanding of okay, I do have to make this decision every day, removes that fear of failure. It's that fear of not being good enough or kind of that insecurity, because it gives you more power to understand I can make this decision every day and if I mess up one day, I have the power to make it again tomorrow.

Cheryl Wolf:

Exactly.

Nika Lawrie:

It doesn't have to be.

Cheryl Wolf:

You know, every day you have a chance to do better, to be better and to start again, and I think it is that whole yeah, you have to do it every day, and I can tell you how many times have I laid in bed and thought, no, I'd rather sleep than get up and go work out. But it's now a habit of I know what it is. But to get there, you do have to say OK, what is the reason and what is the feeling I get? So when you go and do that thing for yourself, that is, for your health, notice how you feel. You feel. You have more. Oh, I have more energy, I feel good. So hold on to those things that feel good and you'll never have to start where you are now. Yeah, like this is New Year's and you and tomorrow and you do this, you're not going to feel that same way again. You're just going to make these small little improvements along the way and then give yourself grace If you fall off. You fall off, everybody falls.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah.

Cheryl Wolf:

But then it's like okay, tomorrow I'm don't wait a week, don't give up completely, just start again. And there is no. There is no um finish line. It's enjoying the journey.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, absolutely. I think that's the biggest part is changing our mindset around around setting these goals. Is that, if you set the goal, start right now, right, this moment, right, and then, if you fail, start again tomorrow morning, but start right when you are living in that moment. Just keep building from there and then really being patient with yourself and giving yourself room to fail sometimes and pick yourself back up and keep going, cause you know we were having the conversation about resilience earlier and, and you know the the before the show and the ability to pick yourself up and keep going is is resilience ultimately, but but for me, like I was saying, I think resilience is just, but for me, like I was saying, I think resilience is just. You just got to keep going. You just got to dust yourself off every time and it's not easy and it's hard and you know, give yourself room to feel like crap and be upset with yourself, but just keep moving forward. It's, you know, creating a lifestyle.

Cheryl Wolf:

Yeah, I think it is that whole thing. You have to know that no one got where they're going by doing it perfectly, absolutely. Everybody makes mistakes, and how do you learn? You can either grow or you can fail. But in that failure, in that moment that you, oh geez, I'm so, I ate this thing, don't beat yourself up, go okay, I had that, and then move on, because you learn something from that moment. And so, yeah, definitely.

Nika Lawrie:

I think you know you say oh, I ate this one bad thing. I think that's also a thing that people often run into is like yes, the good and bad which I really am like.

Cheryl Wolf:

Don't label food because it doesn't have a moral value.

Nika Lawrie:

Right. It's also, too, that you know you don't have to be a hundred percent perfect. Like, don't give yourself a hard time. Like, do like 80, 20 or 90, 10, like, you know, try to eat really healthy the vast majority of the time. And the rest of the time, just be yourself, do whatever it's. You know it's not going to be the absolute end of the time. And the rest of the time, just be yourself, do whatever it's. You know it's not going to be the absolute end of the world.

Cheryl Wolf:

And then reward yourself Along that process. In this new year and new, you reward yourself and don't wait until you've hit a big goal. Reward yourself with small goals. Hey, I went a week and I was, I was so good to my body and I did these things for myself and celebrate. And you know whether it's going and doing something nice, like pampering, or just time to yourself, you know, but definitely celebrate along the way.

Nika Lawrie:

I think you know that was something I was I was talking about yesterday with with the gentleman I mentioned earlier. We were also talking about, you know, we coming into the new year or the first few weeks of January. We're always planning out the rest of the year. We're looking forward I mean pretty much any time of the year.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, we like forward but we never stopped to take enough time to celebrate where we've come from. We don't ever look back, you know. Look back at 2021. What did you accomplish? Celebrate those. Did you take time to celebrate the things that you accomplished? How far have you come on, whatever the goal is whether that's a health goal or a professional goal and take time to just appreciate what you've done so far.

Cheryl Wolf:

Oh for sure it's like you. What's the point if you're not going to celebrate? And then the other thing too, that can be helpful when you're trying to help yourself. Sometimes, when you do something for someone else I like to call them love notes or love bombs and you're not feeling if you write someone a note and tell them how special they are and give that to them, that makes their day, but it also makes yours. And so sometimes by doing something for someone else can help reinforce what you're doing for your own self, or write yourself a note.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely. Yeah, I love that. I mean one of my. You know this is, it's silly and simple, but one of my favorite things to do is I I put together a little goodie bags for the homeless. So I always have, like you know, um, usually sadly it's usually leftover candy from Halloween or like Christmas, or you know, if we have um, I'll, I'll buy some little, those little fruit packs, the the little fruits in the plastic cups, those kinds of things, and we'll just put little goodies in Ziploc bags and I just keep them in my car and as we drive around we say homeless people will give them out and you know it's to do something nice for them. But the reality is it always makes me feel good, it always makes me feel, you know, just happy or, you know, grateful, and those little things, as silly as they are, they really do matter and they can make you feel so much better about yourself.

Cheryl Wolf:

Yeah, it just truly lifts you up. I mean, I think that you know people are like where is my purpose, or you know what do I need to do for? But it is when you give, you get so much more back by, you know, giving a little bit of yourself.

Nika Lawrie:

Yeah, I totally agree. Well, Cheryl, I've loved this conversation. I think it's so important. So many of us struggle with the new year's resolution and keeping it going after the first few weeks of the new year. But you know, like, like we've discussed, it's really about changing our mindset around it and just making things a little bit more simple and giving yourself a little space to kind of figure it out as we go. But I want the listeners to be able to connect with you if they have more questions or they want to work with health coaching with you in the future. So where can they connect with you? How can they find?

Cheryl Wolf:

you. You can connect with me on my website at Cheryl Wolf Wellness, or find me on Instagram, cheryl Wellness. I offer a free coaching call to kind of get like what is it all about if you've never had it before, so it's a great way to try it out and see what it's all about.

Nika Lawrie:

Absolutely Definitely. So I have a couple kind of quick fire questions for you here at the end. Are you ready?

Cheryl Wolf:

Sure.

Nika Lawrie:

Okay, so the first one is what is the most impactful book you've ever read, and why?

Cheryl Wolf:

Oh, it's interesting. I would say A state of wonder was really a great book, um, and it was just the resilience of these people, uh, that they, yeah.

Nika Lawrie:

It was quite a journey and awesome, I have to check that one out. So my second question for you is what is the best either toxin free or eco, eco, eco friendly living tip that you have?

Cheryl Wolf:

Oh I, you know, I would say add essential oils like that's a good one. Essential oils have so many benefits to your senses, to the way we, the things that we smell, can bring you back Like a wild orange, can bring you back to you know, christmas time or a happy moment, and then can also help with your boosting your immune system and all kinds of wonderful.

Nika Lawrie:

It's just that the Zen, like the lavender Zen, and just you know those peaceful moments. Yeah, I am a big essential oil user, I love them. And just you know those peaceful moments. Yeah, I am a big essential oil user, I love them, yeah, Okay. So my last question for you is what does living consciously mean to you?

Cheryl Wolf:

I think it's a practice every day, I think, being conscious and being present and like I think it's checking in with yourself Absolutely and having that day, it's stopping just for a minute and seeing what you're saying, seeing what you're thinking, yeah, and just really paying attention to being present in that moment.

Nika Lawrie:

Love. That Totally agree with you. Absolutely Well, Shara. This has been fantastic. I'm so grateful for the opportunity to connect with you. I'm so grateful for the resources that you're sharing with your clients and our listeners today, and thank you for being on the show.

Cheryl Wolf:

Well, thank you, I appreciate it.

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